It's like God shit irony all over that family
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Randomize
