Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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