Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
