i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
