just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
