I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
whose ass print is on the piano?
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
