I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Randomize
