fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
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