like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
