Porn is love you can see.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
