I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
