Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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