OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Randomize
