your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
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