Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
