Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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