What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize