i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Randomize
