ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
