eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I pour the whiskey from now on
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
