Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
We're like a lot better than the average bears
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Randomize
