we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Terrible idea I love it
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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