Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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