After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
