the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
