It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
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