So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
