ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize