yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I smell like Dick and happiness
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
