I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
