You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
