I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
