"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Watching her eat just hurts me
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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