We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
