i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
