and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize