another moral hangover. fuck.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
