belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
