I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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