i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
