O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Tornado booty call.. dedication
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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