I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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