Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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