I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
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