Christians are straight up FREAKS
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
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