Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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