just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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