woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
she pinky promised me she was 18
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
