Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
