kristin has been a bad kristin
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
