if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize
