it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
