did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize